Requesting an Evaluation: Trust Your Instincts

Trust Your Instincts: Requesting an Evaluation.

What You'll Learn in This Article

As a parent, you know your child better than anyone else. If you've ever wondered whether your child may need extra support at school, this guide is for you.

In this article, you'll learn:

• Signs that may suggest your child would benefit from a comprehensive educational evaluation.

• Why grades don't tell the whole story.

• How to collect meaningful information to support your concerns.

• How to request an evaluation from your child's public school. (script)

• What happens after you submit your request.

Trust Your Instincts

As parents, we know our children better than anyone else.

We know when they come home exhausted in a way that doesn't seem typical. We notice when homework ends in tears, when they begin saying they hate school, or when they suddenly don't want to read aloud anymore. We see the frustration that others may not. We recognize when something just doesn't feel right.

One of the most common things I hear from parents is:

"I don't know if it's enough to ask for an evaluation."

Here's what I want every parent to know:

You do not have to wait for your child to fail before asking questions and you do not have to have a diagnosis.

An evaluation is not about proving a child has a disability. It is a way to better understand how your child learns, what challenges they may be experiencing, and whether they need additional supports, services, or accommodations to be successful at school.

It's About More Than Grades

Many parents assume that if their child earns average or even good grades, they won't qualify for an evaluation. But grades tell only part of the story. School success isn't measured only by report cards.

Some students work twice as hard as their peers just to keep up. Some mask their struggles all day and completely fall apart after school. Some are academically capable but struggle with executive functioning, attention, sensory regulation, anxiety, communication, or learning differences that make school much harder than it appears on paper.

Success at school is also measured by whether a child can participate, learn, regulate, communicate, and belong.

Questions Parents Can Ask Themselves

If you've been wondering whether your child may benefit from an evaluation, consider the following questions over time.

How does my child feel about school?

• Do they regularly come home emotionally or physically exhausted?

• Are they anxious about going to school?

• Do they frequently complain of headaches or stomachaches before school?

• Do they say they feel "stupid," "different," or that they can't do what other kids can?

• Do they melt down after school from holding everything together during the day?

Are there learning concerns?

Does your child struggle with:

• Reading fluency or comprehension?

• Retelling stories in the correct order?

• Writing or organizing thoughts into sentences?

• Spelling or phonics?

• Math facts or mathematical reasoning?

• Following multi-step directions?

• Remembering what they just learned?

Are there executive functioning concerns?

Over a period of time, has your child had difficulty with:

• Staying organized?

• Keeping track of assignments?

• Starting work independently?

• Completing work on time?

• Managing time?

• Staying focused?

• Transitioning between activities?

Are there behavior or attention concerns?

Consider whether your child:

• Gets into trouble frequently at school (formally or informally).

• Is constantly redirected by teachers.

• Has difficulty sitting still.

• Appears impulsive.

• Has trouble understanding social situations.

• Struggles to regulate emotions during the school day.

Is school overwhelming?

Some children experience school as an exhausting sensory environment.

You might notice:

• Extreme fatigue after school.

• Daily meltdowns once they get home.

• Difficulty tolerating noise, crowds, lights, or busy classrooms.

• Complaints that school is "too loud" or "too much."

• Avoidance of cafeterias, assemblies, or other busy environments.

Is your child working much harder than everyone realizes?

Many children compensate so well that adults don't immediately recognize the effort they're putting in.

Ask yourself:

• Does homework take much longer than expected?

• Do they need constant support to complete assignments?

• Are they spending enormous amounts of energy just keeping up?

• Are they successful only because you are reteaching lessons every evening or even doing homework for them?

A child who appears successful on paper may still need support.

Collecting Information Before You Request an Evaluation

You do not need to prove your child has a disability before requesting an evaluation. However, keeping notes can help you clearly explain your concerns. Take a few minutes to write down your concerns and start noting each date and time when a concern or incident occurs.

You don’t need mounds of data but keeping track helps you articulate why you feel an evaluation is warranted when you meet with the school team. Just a small notebook where you jot it down is enough.

Consider tracking:

• How your child feels before and after school.

• Homework struggles.

• Emotional regulation after school.

• Teacher communication.

• Missing assignments.

• Behavior reports.

• Attendance patterns.

• Sleep concerns.

• Specific examples of reading, writing, math, communication, attention, organization, or sensory concerns.

Instead of writing:

"My child struggles."

Try writing more specific observations like:

• Homework takes over two hours every night. (include dates, times, subject matter)

• She cries before reading aloud.

• He forgets multi-step directions every day. (for preferred and non-preferred activities?)

• She sleeps every afternoon after school because she is mentally exhausted.

• He has received several behavior referrals for leaving his seat.(dates, copies of note from school)

• She avoids writing because she says she cannot get her ideas onto paper.

Specific examples are not required to request an evaluation, but they help you paint a clearer picture of your child's educational experience.

Who Should You Send Your Request To?

Your written request can usually be sent to your child's Principal and teacher together. If you're unsure who the appropriate contact is, send it to the principal and request that it be forwarded to the appropriate school team.

Put Your Request in Writing and Use the Right Wording

Always submit your evaluation request in writing and keep a dated copy for your records. A written request begins the school's legal process for considering an evaluation, and we'll take a closer look at what that process involves—and why keeping all school communication in writing matters—in a future blog post.

An email is an appropriate record for written communication with your school team.

You may feel frustrated because you feel you have asked for an evaluation many times and have been dismissed or denied. If you did not make the request in writing using specific verbiage, then you have not actually made the request, and the school is under no legal obligation to respond properly. Below is a script for making your request. While you may wish to change the wording for your request, the boldface first sentence below has the specific wording you should include.

And remember, you do not have to justify specific reasons in this written request. You will have a chance to do that at a meeting the school will hold to determine if the evaluations you request are warranted.

Evaluation Request Suggested Script

Dear [Principal and Teacher],

On [date], I am requesting a comprehensive evaluation for my child in all areas of suspected disability.

I have concerns regarding my child's educational performance and school experience and would like the school team to determine whether my child should be evaluated for special education services, related services, accommodations, or other supports.

I look forward to meeting with the school team to discuss my concerns. Please reply and confirm you have received this request.

Sincerely,

[Your Name]

Remember

Parents are often the first people to recognize that something isn't quite right.

You don't have to have all the answers.

You don't need a diagnosis before asking questions or requesting evaluations.

You don't have to wait until your child is failing.

An evaluation is simply the beginning of understanding your child more completely.

If your instincts have been telling you that your child is working harder than they should, struggling in ways others may not see, or simply not thriving at school...Trust yourself enough to ask the question.

Your voice matters. Your observations matter. And your advocacy may be the first step toward helping your child receive the support they need to learn, participate, succeed, and belong.

Connect

Here to support your family's journey.

Email

Shannon.efteland@gmail.com

The information on this website is provided for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as legal advice. While I strive to provide accurate and current information the laws, regulations, and school district practices may change. Use of this website does not create an advocate-client relationship.

Copyright © 2026 Shannon Efteland. All rights reserved.Content may be printed or reproduced for personal, non-commercial use only. Copying, republishing, distributing, modifying, or using this content for any other purpose without prior written permission is prohibited.